FAWM 2025 #7: Medicinal Porpoises

Having decided to write a lyric messing about with mondegreens and related notions, I banged this one together, and then set about working up a tune for it. However, I made the fatal mistake of trying to inject some extra oomph into the arrangment ("borrowed chords", etc.) and ended up with something that I kinda like, but which is completely unsuited for the lyric! So, time to FAWM this one and get onto the next one.

Lyrics

I've been known to take a drink or two,
Just...... for medicinal porpoises.
Emptied a bottle, or was it two?
Just ...... for medicinal porpoises.

("Dolphins and orcas and whales, oh my!")

"You're making remarkable progress",
I look at that mirror and smile.
When my lips are wetter,
I'm feeling better,
If only ..... for a while.

There're days when all I felt was blue,
For.... hysterical raisins.
Can't get out of bed, or try something new,
Just for hysterical raisins.

("Nuttier than a fruitcake, you say?")

"You've come so far since she left you,"
Says Pharaoh, the king of denial.
Close my eyes to see
The way things used to be,
If only ..... for a while.

Better I'll be when Jose Cuervo I see
By that ... donzerly light.
Mercy me! Now I need to pee;
Where's that ... bathroom on the right?

Folks shake their heads, 'coz I'll take a drink,
Just ...... for medicinal porpoises.
I know my prescription, don't care what they think.
It's just ...... for medicinal porpoises.
© 2025 Tres Seaver